Monday Morning Mirth
Chicago has become the premiere Dress Rehearsal for Broadway Shows before they hit the ground running in New York...
It's a thankless job, but somebody's gotta do it and right now the whole City is enthralled by SPAMALOT, an Eric Idle, of Monty Python fame, creation. An All Star Cast, directed by Tony and Academy Award-winner Mike Nichols, includes David Hyde Pierce, Tim Curry and Hank Azaria, who work the boards with their fratured tale of knights and chivalry.
Thus, I bring you these to try out on your friends, foes and maybe that person stepping all over you on the BUS!
THE OFFICIAL DO-IT YOURSELF
SHAKESPEAREAN INSULT KIT
To construct a Shakespearean insult, combine one word from each of the three columns below, and preface it with 'Thou':
Column 1 .|. Column 2 .|. Column 3
artless .|. base-court .|. apple-john
beslubbering .|. beef-witted .|. barnacle
bootless .|. beetle-headed .|. bladder
churlish .|. boil-brained .|. boar-pig
clouted .|. clay-brained .|. bum-bailey
craven .|. common-kissing .|. canker-blossom
dankish .|. dizzy-eyed .|. coxcomb
droning .|. doghearted .|. codpiece
fobbing .|. elf-skinned .|. flap-dragon
gleeking .|. flap-mouthed .|. foot-licker
goatish .|. fly-bitten .|. fustilarian
impertinent .|. fool-born .|. gudgeon
jarring .|. guts-griping .|. harpy
loggerheaded .|. half-faced .|. hedge-pig
mammering .|. hedge-born .|. hugger-mugger
mewling .|. idle-headed .|. lewdster
pribbling .|. ill-nurtured .|. maggot-pie
puking .|. knotty-pated .|. malt-worm
puny .|. milk-livered .|. mammet
qualling .|. motley-minded .|. measle
rank .|. onion-eyed .|. minnow
reeky .|. plume-plucked .|. miscreant
roguish .|. pottle-deep .|. moldwarp
ruttish .|. pox-marked .|. mumble-news
surly .|. rump-fed .|. puttock
tottering .|. shard-borne .|. pumpion
unmuzzled .|. sheep-biting .|. ratsbane
venomed .|. swag-bellied .|. skainsmate
villainous .|. tardy-gaited .|. strumpet
weedy .|. unchin-snouted .|. whey-face
yeasty .|. weather-bitten .|. Wagtail
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