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Cultural Froids

from the
ChicKnits
What the...
File

OOPS
Martha Stewart commericial with people chanting "We love Martha!" immediately followed by promo of MFTV movie with Cybil Shepard playing Martha.

President's Choice
the US Patent Office has applications for Shock & Awe Barbeque Sauce, Shock & Awe Energy Drink, and Shock & Awe Condoms

Chicago Nobel Prize Physics
Man/woman on street always asks "Do U have a solid quarter for the parking meter?" I think, "Why no, sir/maam, I have a liquid quarter, will that do?" as I hand him/her a US coin and he/she gives me two dimes and a nickel...

NBC DeEvolves
Turned on the tube. Fear Factor popped on: 2 guys actually nursing GOATS and spitting the milk into a glass to drink. I almost fainted.

the Gaper's Block
Coming back to Chicago, I was stuck on the 7-lane Dan Ryan Expressway for 45 minutes in barely moving traffic. Reason: man changing tire...


Saturday, April 26, 2003

a ChicKnits Runway Presentation

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courtesy of Lana Grossa Yarns


Tickle your Fancy!

This is the kickiest eyelash yarn yet...

IT's Cotton! Just perfect for a great Neo-Traditional Look = fluffy, light and flirty!


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click on above picture for the Lana Grossa site, then on Model of the Month in the left Sidebar...

Here's where you can find this yarn: FILATI

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Monday, April 28, 2003

Monday Morning Mirth



Before

courtesy Bear Brand
1967


After

courtesy the Gap
2003




Comments (1)


Tuesday, April 29, 2003

Duh...


Now I remember why I usually never take more than one weeks vacation. Getting back into the swing of things is a *B and a half*. But, taking a long shower in my own stall was cool! My Mom's shower head is installed chest high! Good for those don't even think about getting water on my head days, but rather gnarly for the regular scrubadub.

My first assignment at work was at the Cook Co. Court House at 26th and California. Here you see a virtual slice of thug life and it's peripheral peanut gallery. I was amazed when a whole group of young men went through the metal detectors and stood around putting their belts back on. One guy's pants fell to the floor because that *Crack Attack Show 'em My Undies* thing is still going strong here. (Please make it stop!!!) I pointed my camera (not rolling) at the group and did a slow tilt-up. One for the ladies - you know - you've heard about all those upskirt videos and pix on the net. I hate that.

However, one young lady walked by with a micro-mini on that was so micro, a secret camera was not needed to get an almost full view of her back porch. It always amazes me that the people appearing in front of the judge DO NOT dress for the occasion. Or maybe they are in their Sunday best and I would faint if I saw what they normally wear...

My assigned photo-op fellow was the guy who originally jumped from the stands at Komisky (now US Cellular yuck) Park and pounded the first base umpire. Mr. LeGuie at least looked like a clerk with a shirt and tie - but it was so different, we all missed it when he walked in right past us! Yay! Thugs - 1. Media - 0...

Then it was up almost as far as the Wisconsin border to where there are brush fires. I had to throw away my T-shirt when I got home because: a. I've lost the skill to drive 80mph while drinking coffee; b. It smelled like smoke; c. It had shrunk in the last wash and just clung to my bootay and even mwa, with my less-than-average rack, was getting hit on by the rural firemen. Great MockMe fodder for the boy photogs up there in the woods with me but bad for the product :)




Comments (2)


Wednesday, April 30, 2003

Nuttier than a Fruitcake


One of the weird by-products of my job is the ability to move furniture real fast. Setting up pleasing environments and backgrounds is my sixth sense. In my world, there are no lamps sprouting from that dignitary's head or men seated without knees two feet apart (at least).

Last night around 11pm, I got the moving bug myself but couldn't do anything until I heard the folks downstairs get up around 5am.

My flat is about 5 years old and follows a traditional Chicago layout except for the fireplace. It is an "afterthought" fireplace developers insist on throwing in every new house, but it eats up 5 feet of southern wall space where a nice window could be. It juts out into the room by 2 feet, because the 25' x 125' standard Chicago lot does not allow for a greedy 24 inches of buttage if the thing stuck out of the exterior of the building.

I've never built a fire in it. Won't. Don't care. Hate it. Want the space back.

On the next wall (east) is a beautiful bay window. Because the other trend in flattage is a long open room, I felt compelled to arrange my furniture in a way to keep the flow.

This morning, I moved two nice chairs into the bay, and one couch across the flow area. AND one foot over the edge of the non-used fireplace.

Now I can sit in the bay in a very comfortable chair and KNIT in the beautiful natural light that is present to almost 9pm these days.

I rule! It's 5:51am...


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7:46am: Of course, all of this moving about just could be my reaction to the way my life is so uncontrollable right now. We're still waiting on the analysis from some docs and no matter what you end up telling yourself, it is nervewracking in a way that is NOT pleasing...

The couch move is easy and pleasing - not unlike a log in the middle of a little creek that the water now washes over and rushes by. Texture in the stream can be more interesting than just open space. Maybe I also need to feel cozy and wrapped in my own home's arms.

Tension. Stess. Illness...

So I move furniture and polish my shoes. I love to polish shoes. I am knitting a pair of socks for Mom for Mother's Day. My eyebrows are perfect. I got my hair cut - ooooh - my hairdresser is BACK from Spain and cleaned up the other newbie haircut I got a few weeks ago. My hair is growing faster than I ever remember. Now it's all choppy and flippy just like my brain! Keep fingers crossed for frisky & fun.




Comments (3)


Thursday, May 1, 2003

a Crazy Little Thing called GAUGE...


All sock yarns are not created equal. I am on my 4th go round on the M-Day Sox. I am using Regia 4 Jacquard in a nice combo of blues with the white and grey checkerboard effect. (Wouldn't it be fun to go to the factory where this stuff is "Painted"?)

My first tiny yarn sock was out of Jawolle Jacquard, using #2s. I thought the fabric was the tiniest bit loose. We're talking tiniest - so on the Regia yarn, I went down to #1s (!). Tighter than a drum! Like a board.

Now, post-frogging I read the label. It says 30sts/42rows or 7.5sts per inch. I've got almost 9+ sts per inch. Frog it...

So up to the 2s I go (just like my first tiny-G sock). No way - 8sts per inch. So, in search of the perfect match, FROGGG - on to the #3s.

Loose as a Georgia Goose. (Don't ask me what that means but when I was in college at Purdue, the Indiana folk would say that.)

NOW, I'm getting Psd. Mind you, I am a very experienced knitter who knows and expounds the value of SWATCHING SWATCHING SWATCHING.

BUT, for some reason, I think this sock yarn craze has to be regulated and conform to standards or something. The Global Office of Yarn Manufacturing has MADE these companies behave and only make interchangeable product.

THAT, of course, is a Fantasy that has flown straight from my rear positioned South Brain right to my top positioned North Brain. (Forget Left Brain/Right Brain for a moment - in ChicKnits World, there are either valid ideas or BS...)

AND, I am my own worst enemy in this case, because I believed the label and tried for it's required 7.5 sts per inch. Doesn't this sound ridiculous? 7.5 vs. 8. But we're talking FABRIC that will wear well and it seems in this case, 8 takes the cake...


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The CJ: am almost done with sleeve #2. I am getting my second wind! When those pesky sleeves are finished, I can always see the light at the end of the tunnel...




Comments (17)


Friday, May 2, 2003

ChicKnits Jeopardy

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Shrimp Eye. What allergy happens to Bonne Marie's eyelids when the trees bud out in May? Although she likes to eat 'em, she looks pretty weird with what looks like two shrimp stuck on over her eyes instead of eye-shadow.



Slipperier than an Eel. What are Addi Turbos? After the gauge angst was healed with a piece of peanut butter fudge, Bonne Marie really went to town on those M-Day sox. While getting to the last few stitches of one row, she tugged a might too hard and 5 stitches flew off the end of one needle. Two stitches dropped faster than the temperatures on a Spring day in Chicago. Seems she now has the tension just right/tight enough on that yarn...



Nagaro Nigiri Hah! The plateload of sushi Bonne Marie's going to eat for lunch. It's alway worked as instant Brain Food before and today, since she looks a little fishy anyway, she might as well get all the help she can...




Comments (6)


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WIPs

1. Mrs. CB's Camp Jacket (48%)
Yarn: Sheepy Valley Light Grey Fisherman's Mule Spun Aran
Gauge: 18sts/24rows over 4"
Needles: #6 & #8

2. Magenta Bulb Cardie (33%)
Vogue Knitting Fall 2002 pg 105
"Coppertone" by Shirley Paden
Yarn: Filatura di Crosa 501
Color: 2120

3. SheepyValley Farm Lovat Aran Jacket(10%)

4. Black Bartletts Yarn Ribby Cardie (80%)

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