| Cultural Froids
Bishop/Dr. Brigitte Boisselier is hereby nominated
for Jenny Jone's first Make-Over Show of 2003!
(Hey, I had to learn the hard $$$way I can't wear
that lilac lipstick either...)
January 5, 2003
Leftovers is apparently not a dirty word
in the ChicKnits household. This beige Lamb's Pride
hit the runway on eBay twice without moving and
I, being a magnet for the underdog just couldn't
So when I was at the Knitting
Workshop the other day to get my Mom some new
bamboo circular needles (because her puppy BooBoo
thought the ones she had were chew toys) I grabbed
some beige Gedifra Techno Hair. Love that stuff!
And since I'm on a bucket binge (now that the scarf
binge is waning thank god) I had to just try it.
One strand of Lamb's Pride and one strand of TechnoFur.
Enchant√ - just let me grab my huge black sunglasses
and I'll be off...
January 6, 2003
Monday Morning Mirth
Will the real
please stand UP?
Cloning. Heh. Might've come in handy the last
couple of months I was married. Have 5 of me around
the hub at all times reminding him of my perpetual
gory, OOPs, I mean glory.
Nevermind, it looks like I'll have to wait for my
next go round on the planet. (Please insert a blanket
apology to all believers in re-incarnation here. I
truly do not mean to offend. Having just been flamed
this side of ashes for calling my Knitty
Wrist Warmers *Voodoo*, I don't ever want anyone
to think I don't believe in freedom of speech.)
That being said: here's my short-theory about why
Rael has become such a hottie. (Heh. 55,000 thousand
members worldwide qualifies, no?)
Monsieur Rael was a race-car driver. Correct me if
I'm wrong, but this profession falls into what I'll
kindly call the GetSOme Top 10: Singer/Rock Star,
Politician, Preacher (and Rael has his own Tammy Faye,
non?), Soccer Player, BaseBall Player, Actor, Film
Director, Film Prducer, Race Car Driver, and Matador.
If I've forgotten any, please let me know.
If you look closely at the photo above, you will notice,
and again I'll be kind, M. Rael is not dressed for
success. At least in Chicago, where he would not only
get stared at but might get his a** whipped if he
finds himself over by the White Sox stadium after
Not really a USA chick magnet. (Or rather, not even
close to your basic ChicKnits CoverBoy. Today only,
we've lowered our standards.)
Any way, this fellow is used to the spotlight. He's
used to dare I say, GROUPIES. Another almost unknown
alien life form at ChicKnits, but I've flown pretty
darn close to the flame over, uhHHmm, Viggo.
Back to Rael: what better way to keep the motion in
the ocean than to start one's own cult and have a
built-in, ever fresh, room full of adoring women?
And If that isn't BAD enough for you...
How about creating the Perfect Woman.
Seems like that idea panned out millions of years
Clone-Aid's first offering is named Eve...
It all BEgins
(be sure to wait for this download so you DO NOT
miss the little TV Show)
Theory on the New Zealand Maoiri
Much Is That Doggy In The Vitro?
January 7, 2003
Woman's Intuition: Fact, Fantasy
or Science Fiction?
Not much truly important knowledge has stuck
to my grey matter over the years. All those
seemingly endless hours of study: college calculus,
physics, statistics, chemistry, photography, graphic
design, drafting, engineering, all of it, now paving
the streets of some backwater neurological town
somewhere in my brain. Seems like I've lost most
of the addresses at this place because I just can't
go there anymore. And I have no directory, no snarky
cab driver, no MapQuest...
So I've turned, like most of the women on this planet,
when faced with a desperate lack of information,
to my gut instincts. (This is especially true in
the dating department where I can peg a keeper in
the first 5 minutes.)
A lot of people call that intuition. I like to think
of it more like an uncontrollable mingling of all
the education and living I've done coming together
in a fabulous mental sneer when faced with some
That pesky little doubt tells you, if you do *A*,
*B* is going to happen. Even though you have the
assurance of another person telling you a direction
or a pattern gives you an instruction, you know
from your head to your toes, it is WRONG WRONG WROOOOOONG...
Then you go ahead and do it anyway.
My Bonkers cardie is completely knitted. I spent
2.5 hours Sunday slip stitching the yoke to the
body. (The seam is left on the outside as a cool
design feature.) I knew I was in trouble when the
pattern merely said, "Attatch yoke to body." Hmmm...
I read this way before I was done with the sweater
and just figured it would be a breeze. Yeah.
The pattern also said to bind off the yoke knitwise,
knitting every stitch. This is where the crock pot
of my brain really started cooking and went off
like a three alarm fire because the yoke is 2x1
rib and that would destroy it's flexibility.
So blithely I bind(off) and stitch till I scream.
And the moment I've waited for arrives and I pull
the cardie on and IT BINDS MY SHOULDERS LIKE SOME
HEINOUS LASSO. (O nevermind. I'll block it!)
Something tells me not to weave and bury in my ends
because of course, blocking can't fix an unmovable
edge. You are going to have to RIPIT out.
Lucky for me the slip-stitch is really a chain stitch
and once I pull the end it's going to come apart
like the edge on a bag of dog food. I'm really looking
forward to THAT!
WHY? Because ripping then re-binding off over three
hundred stitches is just gonna make me cry like
a tiny little baby...
January 8, 2003
a ChicKnits Runway Presentation
courtesy of Lana
Lana Grossa Yarns generously
posts a Frisky Furry Pullover Design
Just click on "Model of the Month"
when you get to the index page...
Thanks so much to the folks at Lana Grossa!
You can buy their products online HERE
Exciting Moments of 2003 #1:
Seeing Airforce One fly in
and land at O'Hare Airport. I got to take the quintessential
video of The President arriving in Chicago - the
one where he comes off the plane and shakes the
hands of the dignitaries. He was here for his huge
Exciting Moments of 2003 #2:
Knitting in a Taxi for the
first time. I missed the #66 this morning and couldn't
be late for work so I jumped in a cab. I found out
that I definitely do not suffer from motion sickness
because this driver was Speed Racer & I was speed
January 10, 2003
Exciting Moments of 2003: #3
Even though I know it's an election year
I was thrilled yesterday when the Mayor's Press
Secretary crossed the crowded Grand Opening of the
Bank of America in Chicago and came straight at
She wanted to know where I got my scarf and said
she had been looking at it all through the news
conference. Before I could answer, she said, "OMG,
you made that didn't you?"
What was I wearing?
None other than the LIME
GREEN SKMA scarf!
AHHH... One small step for mankind!
January 11, 2003
Not a Myth
This is dedicated to all of you who knit and
read... I've been knitting a hat over and over
again since before Christmas. It seems if there
is a knitting equivalent of dyslexia, I've got it
bad for this pattern.
Now, over the last two years, I've become a nut
for ribbing. Odd number combinations, broken rib,
ribbing to shape a sweater, ribbing to contract
an open spot so cold air won't attack...
started out in Fisherman's
Rib. The size looked OK but was HUGE and when
worn came down to the nose. So, I tried out Half-Fisherman's
Rib or Shaker Rib to tighten the size.
With both patterns, I made many mistakes because
you knit in stitches below and my Ribbing Mania
would take over and I'd blithely just K1P1 without
watching. I'll call that my natural Reading Rib.
So I've lost track of the times I've ripped out
a couple of rows on this thing...
Why continue? Because this is a great looking pattern
and the resulting hat DOES NOT CAUSE HAT HEAD!!!
Or at least on me...
I'm now at the Crown Shaping (just ripped two rows
back because the caffeine was slow in kicking in
today) and want to have it done by 10am when I meet
my fine friend Edie. RIGHT...
We are making one of our seasonal jaunts up north
to Evanston to a yarn shop (CloseKnit)
to browse and have lunch. I'm researching Aran weight
yarn (18sts/24rows) for a project. I'm looking for
something that has a little drape, but will wear
I like Lamb's Pride (this wonky hat is made from
it and if it can withstand the incredible torture
I've wished on it it can do anything) but it is
just too WARM for me. It's that mohair that gives
it the punch.
I'd like to get a skein of Mission Falls 1824 and
torture test it and maybe something else. I like
the idea of superwash, but sometimes it stretches
and is too soft to wear well. Ideas?
for Your Reading Pleasure
Camus: "The Myth of Sisyphus"
© Bonne Marie Burnsns
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